Tuesday, October 19, 2010

The New Normal?

I have no idea what a normal day looks like anymore.  Each day is a brand new adventure.  I can’t wake up and say “today I will do X”.   Sure, there are tentative plans, but they pretty much change minute by minute.     Everyday, Becca feels different.   Most days we get swarmed by phone calls.   The majority of the people are very sweet.  They offer us help with food, cleaning, and baby items.   Some people are quite pissy for lack of a better word.   They get upset that we don’t pick up the first time they call.   It seems that almost everyday someone stops by.   Some call ahead and some just show up.   Again not a bad thing; most people are sweet and they have our best interest at hand.   I go to work each day and people tell me I look so tired and I need to start resting up because when the babies get here, we won’t have time to rest.   I feel that the only way to possibly get rest is to start turning people down.  I feel this might lead to more upset phone calls.  I think that is part of being a father.  Deciding what is a priority and what is not.   My wife and my unborn children need to be my top priority.   Maintaining my employment gets second priority.  I am under no illusion that the birth of these children is going to be cheap, so I need to remain employed to pay for that.   I am praying more now than I ever have in my life.  God provides for us every single day and moment.   There is that verse in Lamentations 3 about God’s mercies being new every morning.   How can you not be expecting four bundles of joy and not recognize God’s mercies?   Am I tired almost every day?  Absolutely.   I enjoy the weekends so much because I get to nap.   Naps are so wonderful. 

Today I made a life changing decision.  I resigned from being a deacon.   I think for the most part, people will see the wisdom in this decision.   I think others will say if I want to lead my family, I need to be a leader in the church.   I say thee nay.  If I want to be a leader in the church then I need to lead my family first.   My job is to protect them and to be wise with my time and energy.  If I am constantly running around and putting out fires, then I will burn myself out and my family will be getting my ashes.  I don’t want that.   I don’t want my kids or my wife to remember that I was there for everyone else but I missed out on them.   Sure, I think there will probably be a time when I might be a deacon again, but right now there is too much unknown in our lives.   The church will always be a part of our life.   It is filled with such wonderful people.  Sides, I don’t need a title to serve. 

I don’t know how long it will take to discover the new normal.   Things right now are in such a flux.  Maybe the flux is the new normal.  One day life will settle down and have some type of routine.   Until then, we will just have to enjoy the adventure into the unknown.  It’s more fun that way.  If we always knew the outcome of everything we wouldn’t be able to experience the fear which leads to excitement.  Challengers of the Unknown.  That was the name of a comic I read one time.  I don’t remember anything other than the name but that is kind of what we are.  

I do want to let everyone know how thankful we are for everyone that has helped us out so far.   I would list everyone’s name but I am afraid I will leave someone off.   If by chance, I have not returned a phone call, e-mail, or text message, please don’t hold it against me or Rebecca.  It’s not that we think less of you, it’s just you have somehow got lost in the shuffle.  Which is a horrible thing to say, “hey sorry we forgot about you, you got lost in the shuffle.”   We started this blog to give people more frequent updates and yet we haven’t been so good about updating it. 

So here’s the update:

We are doing our best to stay away from getting overwhelmed.  We are going to try to have the babies’ room put together by thanksgiving in case Becca goes on bed rest shortly there after.  In regards to the holidays, we plan on spending them by ourselves.  Not because we hate or are mad at anyone, it’s just large gatherings of people right now wear us both out, which isn’t good for the babies.  That and this will be our last holiday season without kids so we are going to focus on one another.  We don’t know what our lives will bring on a day to day basis but we trust God to take care of us.  Sleep is quite possibly our best friend right now and we wish we had more of it.  We are so blessed with so many honest and good people in our life.  And for all the people who suggest baby names, I will tell you the same thing I tell Spencer: $10,000 a name.  *wink*   Going to need a new van soon.   $10,000 grand would certainly help.

--Posted by Sean


  1. I love you guys. Just so you know that. I'll be there for you when you need or want me. I know I'm busy, but I will do my best to be there for you all.

    By the way, if you want a name, consider Russ or Russell ... =)

  2. Sean and Becca, sounds like you have your priorities right. You, Becca and those precious babies must come first. Enjoy this time, even with all the craziness.


  3. Hey Sean... so onboard with your thoughts of being a good husband and father first and foremost.... as long as... The LORD is standing in that number one spot....which I know HE is for you!! You have made a very wise decision... Prayers for you daily.... much love...

  4. Sounds like a man living from his contract. It brings joy to my heart to read this. Keep on with it brother!

  5. Bravo to your decisions! God would not have given you this challenge without a way to handle it. If that means not working as a deacon, you will be working on a new mission: being a Daddy! God Bless you all!

    Your sis in Christ, Paula


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